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:snuggles down to a nice cup of hot coco:

So yeah it’s a Monday for me and I am sitting here knowing I will be working until 7PM. And Wed 7PM.

But it doesn’t seem so bad any more. A lot of things seem to be showing a little hope for me. I wish you guys could see where I sit. I am looking over on the second story of the building over rolling hills of green with trees and a slight mist over the landscape.

What I would give to be down there right now taking pictures.

What I would give to have a moment stand still just enough to drink it in and day dream about it. But painful as it is this is not the time to live in dreams but to build them. I face the truth that I have let so many of them not die but stored to them in a place that is now aching cause it’s so full it’s over flowing into my memories and haunts me once in awhile.

I never thought the day would come where it hit me that I am settling for normal life. It almost feels as though a part me is lost and it’s not the child in me either but something else. It’s normal I suppose but rather sad to lose something that I consider a friend when no one else was around.

Sounds rather encrypted I suppose. But this is a Journal not everyone is suppose to understand the contents in them.

Oh yeah this weekend I got a lot done and a lot of needed sleep. And next week I might be in New Orleans. I say might cause if I don’t get my friggan day off on Tuesday of next week then I will be sitting at home by myself for the entire week. But I am sure that won’t happen cause I will just tell them I can’t come in cause I am in New Orleans.

Comments

( 22 comments — Leave a comment )
valosonthor
Aug. 30th, 2004 05:59 am (UTC)
You have such a beautiful way with words.

And it sounds like you're actually at peace for once. I'm glad to hear that.
twilightfenix
Aug. 30th, 2004 06:08 am (UTC)
I think you are the first person to tell me that. Thanks

Yeah I feel a little calmer. Like I got my desire back.
sage1217
Aug. 30th, 2004 08:38 am (UTC)
Settling for normal life...a time for building dreams and storing others..

Very powerful words, thoughts and conclusions... Thank you for sharing your journey... although I have to smile and ask..What is normal? ::grins::
twilightfenix
Aug. 30th, 2004 08:51 am (UTC)
What is Normal
some town in PA?
Heh ;)
sage1217
Aug. 30th, 2004 09:26 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
lol dunno...pretty sure I have never been there nor seen it..lol..
twilightfenix
Aug. 30th, 2004 09:35 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
I have met people from there.. They seem pretty harmless.. Well okay one of them called me a bitch .. but Hey everyone has thier opinons .. Doesnt mean they are right
nick1983
Aug. 30th, 2004 10:53 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
If your a bitch your the good type of bitch lol. On anycase, yea. Some of the contents you said I could not put together, but I love the misty image your putting together. Sometimes whole driving along the road I wish I had a digital camera so I could photograph a nature scene or the occasional scene of people. It sounds very nice.

Sorry I guess the artist in me is peeking its head out. its not a sideI show often, but when I do... boy to I endulge!!!
twilightfenix
Aug. 30th, 2004 11:00 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
lol ^_^ Hey nothing wrong with that
nick1983
Aug. 30th, 2004 11:02 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
would help if i could spell correctly huh? :-P
twilightfenix
Aug. 30th, 2004 11:12 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
It would help if I could too Heh
nick1983
Aug. 30th, 2004 11:13 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
:: pounce, ties her up, huggles, carries her out into the mist to take pictures::
twilightfenix
Aug. 30th, 2004 11:14 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
ACKKKKKK!!!! @_@
nick1983
Aug. 30th, 2004 11:18 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
Stephers is mine for the day. ^.^ Mwa ha ha ha. Work can take a hike ( and still pay her mind you) and so can any other worries your havin. Ill sneak you away to a hot spring where you can be pampered. then take you out to a lake with a light coat of mist drifting from it into the forest with the trebright from changing fall colors. and you can do all the indulging you want.

and Ican be Igor the hunchback servant carrying your things. ( a bit wierd but loyal)
twilightfenix
Aug. 30th, 2004 11:20 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
0.o;
Not hot springs for me until I drop the weight.. I can't pamper my self until I reward myself with good work out and and pain and suffering them I will enjoy the hot springs.

T_T - oh god I have 18 more lbs to go or 7 inchs.. :whimpers:
nick1983
Aug. 30th, 2004 11:32 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
Can I atleast give you a back rub?:: pets and huggles:: I still say your a gorgeous beauty, even after a long day of being a nurse at akon and looking like youll pass out soon.. I still know the person behind the body and thats what makes her beautiful :nod nod:: so wheather you think you deserve it or not, your getting a back rub and I'll send you off to take a bubble bath!!
twilightfenix
Aug. 30th, 2004 11:40 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
Medic Aid.

And I am fine Just need to work out more and get back to being healthy.
nick1983
Aug. 30th, 2004 11:41 am (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
gah. alright you win. but when your done torturing youreself Im taking you to a spa!!
valosonthor
Aug. 30th, 2004 12:02 pm (UTC)
Re: What is Normal
Oh, you're totally a bitch. However, you're the lovable, friendly kind of bitch.

**does not associate "bitch" with bad person. rather, defines it as a personality type**
nick1983
Aug. 30th, 2004 12:00 pm (UTC)
If you can, can you give me a call when your off from work?
twilightfenix
Aug. 31st, 2004 04:42 am (UTC)
sorry my cell died and I left at home today .. damn it all
nemoel
Aug. 30th, 2004 09:23 pm (UTC)
NO next week, huh?

Maybe I can scare up the funds to meet you out there if you would like?! No promises though.
twilightfenix
Aug. 31st, 2004 04:42 am (UTC)
Hell if you can I would love it! ^_^
( 22 comments — Leave a comment )