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Today's thought

Why is it people with low self esstem seemed to put down others?

I mean is it just mean or does this make me think they dont have low self esstem but hungrey for attention?

This is my thought for the day.

No this is not directed at anyone. I just noticed lately I have been seeing alot of it and I dont think it's an victum issue as much as trying to grab attention in a negtive way.

:rubs her head: Just kinda popped in my head. Odd..

Comments

( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
sainte_4
Jan. 14th, 2003 08:17 am (UTC)
low self-esteem.
People with low self-esteem believe that everything positive is on the outside of their bodies, their souls, their minds and their hearts, and negativity is on the inside. Therefore, they reach outward to find things that will make them feel better about their own negativity. This happens in one of two ways: either they berate everything on the outside, OR they practically worship everything on the outside. I have low self-worth in some respects (some respects not), and my tendency is to be overly happy about everything other than myself. I have friends, however, who see it differently in themselves, and attack anything that comes their way. It's a control thing- they feel they have no grasp of what's going on with themselves, so they control their emotions about everything else.

*shrugs* That's just how it happens, and they are the ones who have to figure it out.
twilightfenix
Jan. 14th, 2003 09:37 am (UTC)
Re: low self-esteem.
I know I have low Self Esteem as well and I can understand certain aspects of this. It just doesnt seem right to put down another to make your self feel better? It seems like your being a bully. YEah know.. I dont know why I thinking like this today just something that popped in my mind. But you know your comment really makes me think a little more into the matter as well
cluegirl
Jan. 14th, 2003 08:49 am (UTC)
Speculating
People with low self-esteem who put down others are trying to level the playing field. They might be able to feel better about themselves if they can convince themselves and everyone else that the people who seem to have it all together are really faking it, that those people are just as flawed and fucked up as the person himself is, only better at hiding it.

People don't really WANT to think badly about themselves, so they will try and pound down the nail that sticks up higher than they want to try and reach. So I think it's a combination of vanity, self-centredness, (and think about it, people who hate themselves rarely think about anyone or anything EXCEPT themselves) spite, and fear. They're afraid if you really are that good, then they really might be that bad. They can't have that, and they'd rather destroy you, and have some company in the land of pathetic than actually pick their asses up and move toward function-ville.
twilightfenix
Jan. 14th, 2003 09:14 am (UTC)
Re: Speculating
How hard is it to love yourself?

I know I am hard on myself on certain things but only cause I know for a fact I can do better. But I still love myself.. Why is it so hard? You know what I mean?
cluegirl
Jan. 14th, 2003 09:44 am (UTC)
Re: Speculating
Two reasons, in my opinion:

First, to love ones self, one must respect ones self, and trust ones self. One must take responsibility for making ones self into the kind of person you can love. That's a lot of work. Most people are too lazy to work that hard, when you can hate yourself and still survive. People find it hard to forgive themselves for not already being perfect, and they'd rather condemn themselves as a failure than actually admit that they have to work on themselves. Because if they really didn't try, then they really didn't fail completely. There's always the could'a, would'a, should'a to fall back on. So: in short hand, people can't love themselves because they're lazy.

Second, the religion that permeates the culture we grew up in insists that self-love is a sin -- one of the worst sins you can commit: vanity. If you view yourself as anything other than an undeserving turd, preserved from the sewage-pipes of Hell only by the gracious intervention of God's son, then you are vain, self-centred, prideful, and bound straight for Hell. We may consciously ridicule such sentiments as nonsense, but when it's all around us, our subconscious really does absorb it.

A girl who walks straight, head high, and eyes direct, is called vain, and stuck up, and full of herself by her peers, until she learns to creep, look down, and not draw attention to herself. Either that, or she learns to demean and belittle the others until she really DOES deserve those names. A woman who is not docile and submissive to a man's views, wants, and expectations is either beaten into it, or else publicly labelled a bitch, and ridiculed for her 'uppity attitudes.' A man who expects to be treated with respect by his co workers is undermined, betrayed, and sabotaged until he finds himself in a hole with a glass ceiling, and is willing to do anything for anyone to get out of it.

In short, because our American culture prefers people to be broken and fucked up, so that we're easier for the predators among us to control. Chimpanzee males will attack and beat down females who are just coming into heat. They do this so that when she is fertile, and the male comes at her for sex, she will be too afraid of him to resist. Sound like some Fraternities you know?

In the American jungle, self-respect, honourability, and poise have become luxuries, and those who want them have to fight for them constantly. We pay a terrible price too. How many times have you been called a bitch because you weren't convenient to someone? I lost count, myself. If a girl is too sensitive to words like bitch, lezbo, dyke and such, she can be worn down really quickly.
twilightfenix
Jan. 14th, 2003 10:41 am (UTC)
Re: Speculating
ARGHHHH!!! I have to agree on this, because I have so much of that happened with me and my family cause most of them are females. And I was taught to lift my head although it was not always advised to speak up but just find a away around it and quitely resolve it. :shrugs: Man.. You would think people would lighten up on stress issue and stop opressing people and just make things more balanced. But then again eaiser said than done..Right?
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )