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Phoenix date: 03312004

Goddess log:

Being a goddess is more work than people realize and not at glamorous as those jerk offs in Hollywood makes it out to be. I sit at a desk like the mortals, look at a computer screen and take calls. I feel compelled to write a book on how to please a Goddess.

I know the Chief had Ten Commandments. But that is not trendy for me and rather out of date practice. And a Flaming bush, like any would even bother. Hello, can we say California and the brush fires huge mistake on my part. Meh.. I think nice trendy book would do me wonders, and I have Oprah Winfrey. Yeah I know I am still miffed about the Cattle issue in Texas she stirred up but she has help literacy.

I will need to talk to the Chief to make sure my proposal is acceptable I really would hate the false ideal issue to come up again.

1. Address me as PG, It’s not like I don’t drink beer with the rest of yah.
2. Offer me pocky and beer.
3. Please do not ask me for money, fame, to kill someone, make someone fall in love with you.
a. I have bills too
b. Hello! I have my own PR person I am still working on my fame.
c. Killing is just messy and I already have my list I need to complete
d. This goes into the free will category. YOU CAN NOT TAKE FREE WILL AWAY. Already mandated by The Chief.

4. You see that 1-800 Number? Yeah that one…. Don’t call me. Call a sex line you might get better results.
5. You see my email address? Yes, that one that you about to send me for request. DELEAT IT! I like Hi, how are you letters. Or Hey want to come hang out? I HAVE FEELINGS!
6. If you see me popping Midol like it’s Candy that is when you run the other way.
7. And remember to wear Sunscreen because we forgot the answer to the cure. We are still working on locating it. [Damn you Loki for that April Fools joke! The Chief is still trying to get the squid out of the book cases.]
8. If you are going to invite me to a party invite the other deities as well. They might not come but at least we do not have the whole issue with wars in heaven look what happen to the Morning Star! GAH!

Still working on more rules, I am sure I will get up to a thousand. ^_^

Well I need to help with project Doomsday. Apparently we need to reschedule the 7 signs AGAIN!


( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
Mar. 31st, 2004 06:08 am (UTC)
I am amused. :)
Mar. 31st, 2004 06:10 am (UTC)
Hey if I can amuse one person my mission has been completed ^_^
Mar. 31st, 2004 06:11 am (UTC)

Its the beginning of a fun short story I think.
Mar. 31st, 2004 06:32 am (UTC)
Hehe, silly goddess. Worshippers are for real deities.

I have been made happy. =)
Mar. 31st, 2004 06:41 am (UTC)

YAY!!! :: claps her hands ::
Mar. 31st, 2004 07:34 am (UTC)
Got room?
For one more follower (as long as I don't have to swear off the Chief...that is!)...*giggle*

-Tigerlady as Prietess to the High PG... sounds good to me...

p.s. - ya make me smile, Lady, err - Goddess!!! :-)
Mar. 31st, 2004 07:41 am (UTC)
Re: Got room?
Sweetness I will add that in there ^_^
Mar. 31st, 2004 08:06 am (UTC)
Re: Got room?
Buw Ha ha! Actually - I kinda ganked the idea from Cailet - from a post a long time ago about "Love the Cailet Day" when she went off on a funny rant about needing male priests/etc. to worship her. It was purty darn fun!

Mar. 31st, 2004 09:58 am (UTC)
Sorry, milady, but priests can't refer to you as PG. You either have to be the Goddess, or Our Most Holy Lady (or some similar version). I wish I could change it, but its part of the union agreement we had with the Order of Deities last year in return for our dental insurance.
Mar. 31st, 2004 10:04 am (UTC)
V_V - well is you say soo...

::Add memo to update that rule::
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )